When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself ~ Jiddu Krishnamurti

Nonjudgement is an indicator of psychological flexibility, which involves being able to fully experience and engage with the present moment, regardless of its content, and to take committed action towards one's values and goals. This is important because research shows that when we are more psychologically flexible, we are better equipped to respond to change, challenges, hardships, grief, stress, and many other experiences that are part of the human condition.

Non-judgmental awareness allows us to observe our inner experiences with openness and acceptance, rather than getting entangled in judgemental thinking patterns that can lead to psychological distress and avoidance. By cultivating non-judgmental awareness, we can develop greater emotional resilience, improve our ability to cope with challenging situations, and foster a deeper sense of peace and well-being in our lives.

Observing our own thoughts, emotions, and sensations with awareness, but without judging them to be anything other than when they are allows us to respond to them from a more balanced, and regulated place with self-compassion, kindness, and acceptance. This neutral way of noticing experiences without judgement can foster improvements in self-esteem, resilience, and overall well-being, as well as improved relationships, intimacy, and connection. Additionally, when we can move outside of judgment, we can enhance our problem-solving skills by opening ourselves to alternate perspectives and solutions to life’s challenges.

This is not to say that we shouldn’t have preferences, or that there is anything wrong with working toward improving our circumstances. The difference, which is subtle, but important, lies in our motivation. When we are faced with an experience, thought, or sensation that feels negative, it is important to cultivate an understanding of why it feels that way. What is it about the experience that feels this way? Am I motivated to call something bad because it is objectively bad, or because it is dangerous, or because it conflicts with an important core value, or something else? This reflective, informed way of engaging with experiences comes closer to discernment, where we take in all the information, consider the context and our own needs, and respond with intention. The ability to discern safe from unsafe, for example, is valuable and provides us with important information. However, not everything unpleasant is unsafe, and because the human condition involves change, challenges, hardships, grief, and stress, it is vital that we learn how to exist with these experiences.

When we get caught up in the habit of judgement, we may be robbing ourselves of the opportunity to practice the experience of sitting outside of the comfort zone, and becoming more skilled at existing with difficult experiences. Therefore, the caution is not about judgement being inherently negative or bad, but about stealing from ourselves the chance to experience more of what it is to be in this life, and not miss it because we got caught in the cycle of judgement.